How Does a Narcissist Treat the Main Supply?

Understanding the behavior of a narcissist, particularly in the context of their main supply, can be crucial for anyone who has ever been in a relationship with one. A narcissist's treatment of their main supply can range from overt flattery and affection to manipulation and eventual abandonment. This article aims to provide insights into the behavior patterns of narcissists and highlight the key characteristics that make their relationships toxic and harmful.

Phase of Initial Flattery

In the beginning, a narcissist may treat the main supply like a rock star. They may appear proud to have you as their partner, showing you off to their family and friends. You might feel adored and special, as they seem to equate everything they have to offer with you.

Narcissists do not make comparisons between different supplies; rather, they treat each supply based on their current emotional state. For instance, they may seek a sexual conquest to feel attractive or rely on the reassurance and praise from an intimate relationship to boost their self-confidence. These actions are not performed because they truly care about you but rather because they need something from you.

Manipulative Tactics and Comparisons

Narcissists use manipulation and comparisons to assess their needs. They evaluate whether the current supply can fulfill their needs at that moment. For example, if they need validation and feel unattractive, they may seek reassurance from someone else. Conversely, if they feel inadequate, they might reach out to someone they perceive as more successful or better-equipped to complement their ego.

In general, narcissists often prefer new supplies. The novelty and perceived potential for admiration and diversion keep them interested. Once a narcissist no longer finds the main supply interesting or useful, they may treat them as if they were another member of their harem. This behavior is indicative of their overarching need to be the center of attention and the perceived admiration and adoration of others.

Decline from Adoration to Abandonment

Almost every ex was once treated by the narcissist as the main supply. Initially, they might treat you as if you are their soulmate, meaning the world to them, and plan to spend the rest of their lives with you. However, as their interest wanes, you might start noticing a shift in their behavior:

Treating you as if you are not that special anymore and are not so sure about you.

Claiming that you are not as great as you were at first and implying that you tricked them into the relationship.

Making it seem as though they wasted their time getting involved with you, and possibly planning to end the relationship.

Harming your self-esteem by making you feel that you are unintelligent, unable to see through their lies, and inferior.

Treating you like there are other men or women who are better suited for them.

Making you feel that your emotions do not matter and that their actions do not hurt you.

Exhibiting a range of hostile behavior, from hating you to devaluing you, making you feel that all you do for them is meaningless.

Their ultimate objective is to discard you, treating you as the lesser part of the relationship, always working to prove your worth. Eventually, they treat you like trash, considering you as one more indistinguishable member of their harem of exes. Once your supply is no longer needed, they proceed to treat the new main supply the same way they treated you, perpetuating a cycle of emotional abuse and manipulation.

It is essential to recognize the red flags and be wary of such behavior early on. Seeking support from friends, family, or professionals can be instrumental in navigating the emotional turmoil caused by a narcissist and reclaiming your sense of self.