The Worst Resumes Ever: A Look at Ineffective Hiring Documents

Resumes can make or break a job application, yet there are instances where they "do more harm than good". Overly complex templates with too many graphics, colors, and fonts can detract from the message, making the document hard to read and interpret. A focus on aesthetics rather than content is a common pitfall, especially when sections are unclear or information is not concise.

As someone with over 20 years of recruitment experience, I have encountered countless bad resumes. One in particular stands out, a resume I read 17 years ago that has since become a memorable example of poor application writing.

A Case Study in Bad Resumes

The resume in question was from a woman applying for a Software Engineer position, despite having little to no experience in the field. She claimed to have “no experience in this field” but didn’t specify which field she was applying to. Her qualifications included:

A bubbly personality Knowledge of popular culture from TV watching No arrests

Note: While having a clean criminal record is positive, it is an unusual and somewhat odd qualification to include in a technical resume.

A Highlight of Inaccuracies

Under work experience, she listed "four months of internet modelling for a website featuring girls kissing girls." Clearly, this was not a relevant or typical background for a software engineering position.

Despite these glaring issues, she was not hired for the Software Engineer position. Hopefully, she was able to gain new qualifications in a different field to better represent herself in future applications.

Misleading and Creative Descriptions

One resume in our collection highlights the creative but ultimately misleading language that job seekers sometimes use:

Whimsical Descriptions Reveal Unqualified Candidates

Joseph's resume is a prime example of a creative but ineffective resume. According to the document:

"Had his own nuclear reactor to play with" "Dabbled in domestication" Ensured "thousands of hardworking ponies got quality catered lunches of grains, oats, and grasses every day."

While the text is engaging and easy to read for toddlers and young children, it has an extremely polarizing effect on potential employers:

"Either the least or most employable person ever" – The Huffington Post

Check out our list of the worst resumes ever for more examples of how not to present yourself to potential employers.