The Perfect Partner: Defining Desires and Non-negotiables

When it comes to personal relationships, setting expectations can often lead to letdowns. However, having a clear set of criteria can help guide one's choice of a partner. In this article, I share my own list of qualities I'd like in an 'ideal' partner, along with some non-negotiables that would immediately make me lose interest in someone.

1. A Passion for Cooking

While we are all unique individuals, certain basic life skills are non-negotiables. For instance, cooking is a significant life skill that ensures we can take care of ourselves. My ideal partner would not only cook for herself but would also be someone I can cook with. The first Indian woman to win a Michelin star, Chef Garima Arora, is an inspiration for me. She is a master of her craft and can whip up delicious meals with ease. Naturally, your partner doesn't need to be a Michelin Star chef, but having a basic understanding of cooking is essential.

2. A Good Sense of Humor

Laughter is indeed the best medicine, and having a partner with a great sense of humor can make life much more enjoyable. Life can be overwhelming; finding someone who can bring a smile to your face, especially during difficult times, is priceless. While I appreciate the likes of Sharvari, who is literally the epitome of fun, no one is perfect. My key point here is that you should enjoy each other's company and laughter can do wonders for mending fences.

3. Peaceful Conflict Resolution

Life is never devoid of disagreements, but how these disagreements are handled can make or break a relationship. My ideal partner would prefer peaceful conflict resolution over heated arguments and shouting matches. As an illustrative story, once a disciple asked his teacher why they shout during arguments. The teacher responded that if we need to speak to someone far away, we shout to ensure they can hear us. Similarly, when we get angry, the distance between our hearts and those of others grows. Therefore, shouting does not help in resolving issues but merely escalates them.

4. Good Compatibility with Family

Family plays a significant role in our lives, and having a partner who gets along well with both sets of parents is crucial. As someone who adores my mother, the thought of not having her around is heartbreaking. Thus, it is important for my partner and my mother to share a good bond. This compatibility can significantly impact the overall happiness and stability of my life.

5. Emotional Intelligence

While intelligence is certainly important, emotional intelligence (EQ) is equally vital. Having a partner who understands and manages their emotions and the emotions of others can create a more harmonious environment. This emotional awareness is key to navigating various situations effectively. Emotional intelligence also includes understanding and empathizing with others, which can help build stronger relationships.

Personal Preferences and Pitfalls

While some of these criteria might resonate with you, others might not. It is important to note that these are my personal preferences when it comes to the qualities I would look for in an ideal partner. The term 'ideal' is crucial here, as it may not be a list that every individual would agree with. However, the key takeaway is that having a clear set of criteria and recognizing non-negotiables can help in making informed choices and fostering strong, meaningful relationships.