How Can I Support My ENFJ Friend?

As an ENFJ, I often find myself in situations where people show their support, and it truly means the world to me. When you ask how to support me, this question resonates deeply. It’s not just about offering words of encouragement, but it’s about being there for someone who is deeply invested in the care of others, often sacrificing their own needs.

ENFJ as Iceberg People

ENFJs are often referred to as iceberg people. We put on a vibrant, extroverted exterior while hiding our inner turmoil and stress. We dedicate ourselves to ensuring the well-being of others before our own. Our love and support for humanity often lead us to neglect our own needs. This can be exhausting, but it’s part of our nature to help others.

ENFJs can also be oxygen mask friends. In times of crisis, we may put on a brave face, fearing that our pain or stress would add more burden to the already struggling. However, when we finally reach our breaking point, we want someone to be there for us. We need not just empathy but practical support and emotional presence.

Understanding the ENFJ Mindset

ENFJs are often harder on themselves than anyone else in their life. We can go through rough patches where our mental health and well-being are significantly impacted. My friend’s support at my lowest point was truly invaluable.

Supporting an ENFJ

When an ENFJ is struggling, offering support is about more than just being present; it’s about being a shoulder to cry on, a confidant, and a problem-solver. Here’s how you can support your ENFJ friend:

Stay by Their Side: Simply being there can be a tremendous comfort. Stay with your friend through the difficult moments, whether that means listening to their worries, being a friend, or just keeping them company. Listen and Validate: When your ENFJ friend feels overwhelmed or distressed, listen to their concerns without judgment. Let them know that their feelings are valid and that you care about them. Promote Self-Care: Enforce the importance of self-care. Encourage your friend to take breaks, eat well, exercise, and prioritize their mental and emotional health. Encourage Professional Help: Sometimes, the support of a therapist or counselor can be incredibly beneficial. Encourage your friend to seek professional help if they are struggling with depression or anxiety. Provide Practical Support: Offer to help with tasks or errands that might be overwhelming for your friend. Simple acts of kindness can make a big difference.

Encouraging Self-Worth and Resilience

ENFJs are incredibly resilient and fighting spirit. Your support can help reinforce their sense of self-worth and resilience. Here are some phrases that can make a significant impact:

“I see how hard you have been working, and I’m so proud of you.” “You’re so strong and capable. You’ve got this!” “You are enough. Exactly how you are and how you feel in this moment.” “You matter to me, and I’m thankful to know you.” “It’s okay to be sad. You don’t have to hide from me! I’m not going anywhere.” “I see you have a lot on your mind. Can I do anything for you?”

These simple phrases can empower your ENFJ friend during times of struggle. Even if you’re not an expert in psychology, offering these forms of support can make a profound difference.

Conclusion

Supporting an ENFJ friend requires more than just words; it requires a deep understanding of their nature and a willingness to be there, even when it’s hard. By showing your care and support, you can make a significant impact on their life. Remember, true friendship is about being there, even when the going gets tough.