Narcissists and Relationship Control: Do They Throw Tantrums Easily?

Love is often portrayed in movies and literature as a fairytale with true love conquering all. However, reality can be far more complicated, especially when dealing with individuals who have narcissistic traits. In such relationships, temper tantrums unfortunately become a regular part of the dynamic. The longer the relationship persists, the more these episodes tend to surface, causing significant distress and erratic behavior from those individuals.

The Evolution of Temper Tantrums

When considering narcissistic behavior and how it manifests in a partnership, it's crucial to understand that these temper tantrums have always been a part of the dynamic. They are not new elements that sneak in later on; rather, they simply become more pronounced with the passage of time. Initially, these tantrums might have been hidden or suppressed, given their harmonious intentions early in the relationship.

The Suppression Period

During the early stages of the relationship, the narcissist might have been exercising a charm that appeared magical and irresistible. At that point, they hoped that you would notice minor indiscretions and choose to overlook them. If you did spot something, they would dismiss it quickly to maintain the facade of perfectionism. It's important to recognize that this suppression phase is not unique to narcissists; rather, it's a strategy employed by everyone who is trying to control or charm their significant other.

Control and Manipulation: The Root Causes

At the core, tantrums in a relationship with a narcissist are about control. Emotional manipulation is their weapon of choice. These individuals thrive on being the center of attention and have little tolerance for their expectations being ignored. One small mistake or failing to follow their wishes can trigger their defenses, leading to explosive reactions.

The Significance of Faux Pas

When a partner makes a mistake or fails to adhere to a directive, it can be seen as an indication that they are not fully in the control of the relationship. A narcissist might react with a tantrum, whether it's through screaming and yelling, or even more covert methods like the silent treatment. These are tactics aimed at regaining authority and ensuring obedience. In the eyes of the narcissist, deviating from their expectations is an audacious act that undermines their sense of power and control.

Understanding Covert Narcissists: The Silent Treatment

Some narcissists prefer to express their dissatisfaction through the silent treatment—a more nuanced and subtle form of emotional manipulation. Huffy silence, cold shoulders, and a general sense of detachment can be extremely damaging over time. It instills feelings of inadequacy and uncertainty in the partner, who begins to second-guess their actions and constantly seeks validation.

The Impact of Emotional Control

The silent treatment is about exerting emotional control and asserting dominance. It's a method for making the partner aware of their perceived inadequacies and for reinforcing the narcissist's superiority. In a sense, it's a covert tantrum, designed to unsettle and manipulate the partner without the noise and drama that comes with public outbursts.

Strategies for Dealing with Narcissistic Behavior

Dealing with narcissistic behavior in a relationship requires immense patience and clear boundaries. It's important to establish and communicate your own needs and limits, and to seek support from trusted friends or professionals. Recognizing the signs and understanding the underlying motives can help in managing the situation more effectively.

Setting Boundaries

Setting boundaries is essential when dealing with a partner who exhibits narcissistic behavior. Clearly define what behaviors are unacceptable and be firm in maintaining those boundaries. Consistent and assertive communication can help establish a healthier relationship dynamic.

Seeking Support

Dealing with narcissistic behavior can be emotionally draining. It's important to seek support from trusted friends, family, or professionals. Therapists specializing in relationship dynamics can provide valuable insights and strategies for navigating these challenging situations.

Conclusion

In conclusion, temper tantrums caused by narcissistic behavior are a common feature in long-term relationships. These outbursts are rooted in the need for control and emotional manipulation. Understanding the underlying motives and strategies can aid in managing such dynamics and fostering a healthier relationship.

Keywords: narcissistic behavior, temper tantrums, emotional manipulation