Is It Wrong to Call Your Sister Autistic?

The topic of labeling a sibling with a diagnosis, particularly one as impactful as autism, often arises in intimate family dynamics. When a sister or brother vocalizes their autism, it is crucial for family members to approach it with sensitivity and respect.

Teaching Your Sister About Her Diagnosis

The initial step in addressing this issue is education. Teach your sister that it is natural for people to be curious about her. If she is verbal, she can even explain her diagnosis to others herself. This understanding can help her gain confidence and assert her identity. When others ask about her diagnosis, it is okay to inform them, but always include your sister in the conversation to ensure her perspective is valued and considered.

Respecting and Embracing Autism

Autism isn’t an insult; it is a diagnosis. It is an essential part of who your sister is. Encouraging her to embrace her diagnosis and portraying it as a positive aspect of her identity can provide her with the strength needed to navigate social situations.

For many people, feeling recognized and accepted for their unique traits is crucial. Your sister likely wants to be seen and treated just like your other friends, with kindness and respect. This means treating her with the same courteousness and inclusiveness you afford to others in your life.

Navigating Sibling Dynamics

When your sister calls you autistic, it’s important to understand the context. Is she using it as a playful reference or as a way to mimic others? Understanding her intention can help you respond appropriately and avoid unnecessary conflict. If it serves her needs and she does not object to it, it may be fine to let it slide.

On the other hand, if she uses the term in a derogatory manner, it is crucial to address her behavior. Calling someone autistic to insult or demean them is not only offensive and hurtful, but it also perpetuates harmful stereotypes about the autism community. This behavior can be detrimental to your sister’s self-esteem and the general perception of those living with autism.

If you witness your sister using the term in a derogatory manner, gently and respectfully guide her toward using more respectful language. Emphasize that everyone has their unique strengths and challenges, and it is important to treat everyone with kindness and understanding.

For example, you might say, "Hey, that’s a nice way to talk about yourself, but using autism as an insult isn’t kind. How about we use words that show respect for everyone, just like how we treat our friends?"

Conclusion

Calling your sister autistic is not inherently wrong if she is comfortable with it and it is used without ill intent. However, it is crucial to be mindful of your sister’s feelings and the broader impact of your words. Treating her with the same respect and kindness you extend to all your friends is essential. If she is uncomfortable or if it is used in a derogatory manner, it is important to address the issue and work together to foster a positive and supportive environment.