Do People with Difficult Personalities Realize Their Challenges?

As a seasoned SEOer for Google, I've encountered a variety of personality types, but one particular group has consistently drawn my attention: those with what I classify as very difficult personalities. Are they aware of their behavior or are they completely oblivious?

Understanding the Personality Trait

In my experience, individuals with challenging personalities often suspect they have issues, yet they are at a loss as to how to start making adjustments. For them, their own personality is simply the environment they live in. It's a familiar and comfortable space, so when someone points out something obnoxious, it can be quite the mental challenge for them to re-evaluate and make necessary changes. Habits formed over years are immensely difficult to break, especially when they have become an ingrained part of an individual's identity.

An Examination of Context

One key factor here is context. Difficult personality traits are often compared to the personalities or norms of other individuals or cultures. For some, being 'difficult' might be defined in comparison to someone with an easy-going or highly agreeable personality, or in contrast to a highly polite culture. However, that doesn’t necessarily mean it matters. People with demanding and challenging personalities often feel entitled to their behavior because of what they perceive as their "burden of difficulty."

Assessing Awareness and Adjustability

When we talk about 'difficult personalities,' I assume we're referring to individuals who possess traits of low conscientiousness, low agreeableness, low openness, and perhaps a lack of politeness. In such cases, it would be challenging for someone not to recognize these characteristics. For example, if you know what kind of personality you have, you can predict your behavior in various situations. It should logically follow that individuals with these traits understand their identity, unless they are exhibiting traits of sociopathy or psychopathy, where understanding and self-awareness may be severely compromised.

With that said, I cannot speak to every single difficult person, but I will draw from my own experiences as a relatively difficult individual. What I've observed is that within this group, there is a wide range of awareness and willingness to change. Some individuals may brag about their behavior, while others, regardless of their level of awareness, either do not care or refuse to take responsibility for improvement.

Therefore, while it's often difficult to pinpoint with certainty if any given individual is aware of their challenging personality, it is generally safe to assume that many are at least partially aware. However, the willingness to address and change these traits can vary widely based on the individual's emotional intelligence, self-awareness, and the level of support they receive.