Definite Deal Breakers for an INFJ: Identifying Red Flags in Relationships and Professional Settings

As an INFJ, I've learned that there are certain red flags that can make or break a relationship or professional environment. These deal breakers are deeply personal and shed light on what specific traits I find unacceptable in my partners, employers, and close friends. In this article, we will explore these deal breakers and understand why they are significant for those with an INFJ personality type.

Relationship Breakers from an INFJ Perspective

From a male INFJ's perspective, several traits are absolute deal breakers:

Trust Betrayal: When trust is broken, there is no second chance. This includes infidelity or any act that damages the core of a relationship. Emotional Burden: Constant emotional support can become too toxic if not handled with care. Multiple chances may be given, but if it continues to feel draining, it's time to consider moving on. Kindness and Respect: Treating others unkindly early in the relationship can be a red flag. Even multiple chances may be given, but if someone continues to treat others poorly, it's likely to be an ongoing issue. Cognitive Dissonance: If our conversations are not intellectually stimulating, the relationship may not last long. We need to find common intellectual ground to truly connect.

When examining past employers, key deal breakers include:

Lack of Challenge: If an environment is not intellectually stimulating or if there's no room for growth, it's not a positive fit. Societal Impact: We value contributions to society and would not work for an organization that is not making a significant positive impact. Fairness: Respecting the efforts of employees is crucial. Even if recognition is not expected, we need to feel respected.

When evaluating close friendships, many of the same markers apply:

Trust Betrayal: Disloyalty is an absolute deal breaker. Trust is not easily regained once it's broken. Comfortable Companionship: A friend must provide a comfortable and supportive presence. This is not to be taken for granted. Similar Interests: While not a strict requirement, having shared interests significantly enhances the depth of the relationship. Accepted Criteria: To enter the inner circle, one must pass a 'test,' which can be an informal assessment of interpersonal skills and loyalty.

Additional Deal Breakers:

Low Intimacy: If a woman does not value intimacy as highly as I do, it is a significant red flag. Smoking: Personal hygiene and health habits are important, and smoking is a deal breaker for many INFJs. Private Jet: Owning a private jet, or having an old one, is a strong indicator of wealth and status for some INFJs. It symbolizes financial stability and the ability to invest in luxury. Consistent Deception: Dishonesty and a disregard for feelings are both forms of betrayal. If trust cannot be established, a relationship is difficult to maintain. Manipulative Behavior: Recognizing a manipulative attitude is critical. If a relationship feels like a mind game, it's a significant warning sign.

Conclusion:

An INFJ's perspective on deal breakers is unique and deeply personal. Trust, intellectual stimulation, and mutual respect are not just important, they are essential. By recognizing these red flags, INFJs can make informed decisions that lead to healthier and more fulfilling relationships and professional environments.

Keywords:

INFJ traits deal breakers relationship red flags professional challenges